3:00 AM Phone Calls

It is past 4 in the morning and sleep hasn’t found me yet. I read several books, blogged, watched recaps of How To Get Away With Murder and yet I am wide awake. I opened my Whats app to check the last logged in of a certain person. I was surprised to see messages from him telling me that he saw my post here. When my phone buzzed I thought it was just another notification on twitter, apparently I was wrong. I didn’t know he still reads my blog. After few replies, I closed the app and opened Candy Crush Soda hoping that it will bore me and force me to sleep when suddenly my phone rang. I almost dropped my phone but held tightly to it because this certain person is calling.

  

For a split second I thought of not answering the phone. I mean this certain person only calls whenever he has a free time from work. One missed call. As I was to put down my phone it rang again and this time I answered. I am glad I did because he was literally like an exploding volcano. He kept ranting on some guys at his work and I know how hard and tiring and nerve wrecking it is to work with some people he is working with. I honestly do not mind this. I mean, I know he is very talkative which I surprisingly adore. Like seriously, he can go on for hours nonstop and I strongly believe that he will go on if only he is not at work. I let him open up and say whatever he wanted to say because I want him to calm down afterwards. I know he is not done talking when he said that he needed to hung up. For a moment, I realized I have not said anything except for “hello” and “you need to calm down” and “want a hug?“. For that 10:53 minutes call, he did all the talking and still I am in no way complaining. I am not compelled to answer him but I want to be there for and to listen to him.

  

I sent him a text message since I was not able to talk as much as he did. It was good to hear from him though too bad that it is under such circumstances. I have a lot of people on my Whats App, I opened it once again to check my call log and I noticed that almost all are from him; only four call logs from one other person and everything else is him. Most of our phone calls were more than one hour. I guess the longest we continuously talked is about three or four hours.

  

We both have given each other so much of our time talking and texting that somehow helps us to get to know each other better. Pictures are sent from time to time; he has the highest number of pictures sent and not to mention all the videos of him talking – it consumed like more than 2 GB of my phone memory. I can create an entire video album of him because he sent a lot. Our shared media gallery in Whats App is 224. But frankly, 95% of that 224 is HIM. Out of the 224, 54 of which are videos of him.

  

I have pushed everyone I met online away except for this one certain person. Honestly, I have had thoughts of pushing him away but no matter how I try to do it, I just cannot get myself to really do it. We do not talk every single day like we used to but I know he is trying whenever he can and when he isn’t playing Resident Evil 6 with his roommate Richard (oops!). I wanted him away from me because I am getting used with him being “around” and I think that it is not good but it feels good. It is so confusing. Probably it is because of how happy he makes me feel. You know, the smile that your lips make when you see someone who really means to you is calling or even just an effin text message. He has that kind of magic over me and I do want to believe he is aware of that. Oh I know he is fully aware of that! Also, (this he do not know) I have this kind of “deadline” for guys; we will only communicate for one month then its done and it happened with everyone except him. It is past two months now since we met. He is an exemption.

AB

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