She Is Not Just Into You

Okay. So there is this book He’s Just Not Into You which I love by the way that has been read by millions of women. But how about those women who are not into him? Is there such a book? Or because more than 60% of men wouldn’t give a damn? This is just a random thought.

I went out on a date couple of days ago with a guy whom I met through a common friend. He is fine with our exchange of messages until we decided to meet. I was not hesitant as he is a friend of my friend so I pushed through with it. We had dinner and went to a bar. Physically, he is not really charming but who am I to judge by his looks. I considered this a bad date not because of how he looks because he looked decent to say the least. What broke me off the momentum of enjoying this date is the lack of having something in common. I know this happens so I let it pass and rather hope that both of us can share our interests with each other. To my surprise, we were silent most of the time. I kept on trying to open up and ask questions about his interests but he’d responds very little and I felt like he is not being himself. He is trying to show off and that for me is a turn off. In addition, he would sometimes challenge my beliefs which I think is too serious to talk about during a first date. I said previously that during a date one must always put his or her best foot forward but still be yourself.

After the date he gave me a ride home. It was past 3 in the morning and I was tired. This was the most awkward part; how to part ways. I reached my hands out to shake hands but he took it and hugged me and he kissed my cheeks. He went home. He messaged me several times but I am not interested anymore. He is into it and I am not.

I do believe that there are women who experienced this kind of date and that a lot will experience this in the future. I honestly did not have the guts of telling him that maybe we can still be friends or remain friends. I am not replying to his messages now and when I do so, it was just “okay”… he asked for a second date and I replied that I will be busy the next few days even if I wasn’t. Even if I know that I can make time if only I like the first date we had.

Unlike some guys or most of the guys who will just stop messaging women after their first dates if they find that they do not like the woman I think that it is different with women. Sure, there may be some who would just stop replying – I’ve done that before but I think it is not appropriate. I know I should have said something like he could have opened up more but chose not to. I date guys to know them based on who they really are rather than telling them to “open up” or “talk about this or that”.

So what really happens if she is not into you? There will definitely a change in a way she responds to your messages if she chose to still respond. Second, no more second or third dates. And more over she will not give a damn about you. It is mean but perhaps its just the way how it is.